Strange title, eh? Well, could not think of anything better! Anyways, without wasting much time, will get down to what I intend to tell.
Last week, my best friend was in Bangalore. As usual, I went to meet him. His grand parents had also come down to visit them. As ours is a long standing friendship, we both know almost everyone in each other's family.
His grandfather is a very jovial and a kind hearted person. He always leaves me amazed in the way he treats both adults and youngsters with equal respect.
That day, my friend's grandfather was in a rather pensive mood and was churning out many advises. Many of which directly related to our lives. I thought of writing about one particular advise which instantly struck chord with me.
In his usual style, my friend's grandfather commented-- "Hennu, Honnu, Mannu ella namma runa idhange maga. Sikkidre jaasti santosa nu padbaardu, sikkdidre dukha nu padbaardu".
Translated to english, it means-- "We getting the things we want so badly, cheifly the girl, money or land, is wholly and solely determined by our fate. Therefore, we must not be excessivily happy when we get it or be depressed when we dont".
The more I thought about these words, the more I realised how true they were. I instantly dismissed the last two. Honnu and Mannu (Money and Land). They were related to his age. In the present IT/BT age, making money is more and more in our hands than in fate's. A strong will coupled with hard work makes fate redundant in these cases. I felt worried about the only remaining item on the list. Hennu- Girl.
On this point, I found that my friend's grandfather was dead right. How much ever we desire or deserve someone, how much ever we try to attain our goal, the result ultimately is not in our hands. The external factors, often negatve, are innumerable. I am sure everyone knows about the factors. I prefer not to elaborate on those here.
I told my friend's grandfather that I fully agreed with him on this point. He gave a satisfied smile. My friend sighed and murmured "Ella sari, dukha padbardu andre hege? Ashtu kashta pattu sigdidre dukha aagallva?"(What do you mean, dont feel bad? Its quite natural to feel bad). I looked at my friend in surprise. Why was he asking that question? That was the first thing I asked him when we were alone. He clarified that he was talking on behalf of one more freind who was struggling to come to terms with the harsh reality of this adage.
The wise old man patted his grandson. Obviously he had seen and faced it all. "Dukha aguthe maga... Aadre dukha na nungi nagta irovne manushya. Yaava vastu nu namage sigo tanaka namdu annkobaardu. Adhe secrtettu", he smiled at his kanglish. Roughly he meant that we must make a conscious effort to forget our worries and keep smiling.
Though it was a valuable lesson, I feel strongly that its time we shunt out the last remaining item in that adage out of fate's reach. Our society took centuries to achieve the eradication of first two. Wonder how long the third will take!
Last week, my best friend was in Bangalore. As usual, I went to meet him. His grand parents had also come down to visit them. As ours is a long standing friendship, we both know almost everyone in each other's family.
His grandfather is a very jovial and a kind hearted person. He always leaves me amazed in the way he treats both adults and youngsters with equal respect.
That day, my friend's grandfather was in a rather pensive mood and was churning out many advises. Many of which directly related to our lives. I thought of writing about one particular advise which instantly struck chord with me.
In his usual style, my friend's grandfather commented-- "Hennu, Honnu, Mannu ella namma runa idhange maga. Sikkidre jaasti santosa nu padbaardu, sikkdidre dukha nu padbaardu".
Translated to english, it means-- "We getting the things we want so badly, cheifly the girl, money or land, is wholly and solely determined by our fate. Therefore, we must not be excessivily happy when we get it or be depressed when we dont".
The more I thought about these words, the more I realised how true they were. I instantly dismissed the last two. Honnu and Mannu (Money and Land). They were related to his age. In the present IT/BT age, making money is more and more in our hands than in fate's. A strong will coupled with hard work makes fate redundant in these cases. I felt worried about the only remaining item on the list. Hennu- Girl.
On this point, I found that my friend's grandfather was dead right. How much ever we desire or deserve someone, how much ever we try to attain our goal, the result ultimately is not in our hands. The external factors, often negatve, are innumerable. I am sure everyone knows about the factors. I prefer not to elaborate on those here.
I told my friend's grandfather that I fully agreed with him on this point. He gave a satisfied smile. My friend sighed and murmured "Ella sari, dukha padbardu andre hege? Ashtu kashta pattu sigdidre dukha aagallva?"(What do you mean, dont feel bad? Its quite natural to feel bad). I looked at my friend in surprise. Why was he asking that question? That was the first thing I asked him when we were alone. He clarified that he was talking on behalf of one more freind who was struggling to come to terms with the harsh reality of this adage.
The wise old man patted his grandson. Obviously he had seen and faced it all. "Dukha aguthe maga... Aadre dukha na nungi nagta irovne manushya. Yaava vastu nu namage sigo tanaka namdu annkobaardu. Adhe secrtettu", he smiled at his kanglish. Roughly he meant that we must make a conscious effort to forget our worries and keep smiling.
Though it was a valuable lesson, I feel strongly that its time we shunt out the last remaining item in that adage out of fate's reach. Our society took centuries to achieve the eradication of first two. Wonder how long the third will take!
10 comments:
no comments..i know wat this guy meant
Hey Vinod,
I dont know what you mean... :))
well, i disagree to half [actually 66.66%] of what u said. I still feel that money and land also r determined by fate.. even in the age of IT/BT.
first of all because IT/BT shrinks into a negligible minority when u take the big picture into account. secondly because even within any of these lucrative industries, the disparity exists.. many-a-times, fate decides ur career path and, hence, ur money/land.
Of course, the operative phrase here is "many-a-times". in case of money/land, its fate just has a "big role" but is not THE factor. but things r different in the 3rd case.
that brings us to the 33% where i concur with u... something desperately needs to be done to reduce the role of fate in deciding a life partner.. and the biggest chunk of this will be taken care if a people of a certain generation of middle-class India r ready to lose their narrow-mindedness
Well, let me clarify one thing first...
It doesnt affect me as my chances of finding a girl on my own is almost near to minus infinity :))
Now, coming to ur 66.66% funda :). I guess India has now reached a stage where if a person is competent enough, he can get himself a decent living. Please remember that I am not talking of becoming rich or owning acres of land. Also, by "person", I invariably mean youth.
And, yes IT/BT is just a small chunk. I was merely taking them as examples. But there are hundreds of other means to make a living.
To summarize, my view is not diametrically opposite as yours. Nevertheless, it is different.
Abhi,
Awesome post!
One thing about the 33% that Kiran referred to. That too is a function of our own decisions. You cannot wait for a "generation of middle-class India" to lose their narrow-mindedness. In fact, many of them are already on their way to losing it. My policy is this: If you like someone and he/she likes you (that itself is so difficult [remember my catch-22?]) you (or anyone) should forge ahead - irrespective of what anyone thinks. After all, it is your life, not theirs. Further, many folks of that generation cannot stay mad at folks of your generation for ever. So, there you go - what is required is clear intentions and immaculate execution.
Gops,
I really really wish that people like me had the gut and courage to do what you said.
But alas! The people of that generation do one more thing. They effectively take away courage from you and they make you follow a rule from the very beginning-- Going against us is eternally bad for you! And for once, breaking rules become very very tough.
There you go. Unable to wait, unable to break the rules... Some people really get stuck up very badly :(
"They effectively take away courage from you "
How true.. i mean u wudnt want to hurt their feelings.. and u end up "sacrificing"
Hey abhi,
I completely agree with ur friend's grandfather. Regarding the 66% which u r talking abt, i feel even that is fate itself. Isn't it the fate which made ppl to get into a position so that they can earn a decent living?? Well if u say that hardwork is what matters, yes, i agree hardwork does matter. But how much ever hardwork u put in, there is an element of luck (fate) which is needed. I myself have seen a huge number of ppl who work really hard, may be to pass an exam or to get in somewhere, but just couldn't do it, while a lot many of them do get in with minimal effort.
Regarding that 33%, well yes, once both start liking each other, we are in a position to forge ahead. But, as Gops aptly put it,"If you like someone and he/she likes you (that itself is so difficult)", u can see the fate's hand in here too. The very fact, that it depends on the other person too plays it into the fates hand. No matter how much u love someone and how much ever u r willing to go to the end of the world with them, u will get their love only if it is in ur fate.
All in all, i completely agree with the grand father of ur friend, and obviously have a different opinion from u :)
LOL good post...i agree getting land and money is in our hands, what with so many opportunities today...and yeah, most of ur struggle with the third part (not just guys, gals too!) and agree that a lot of indians still face problems finding someone on their own (conservative upbringing?? shyness?? whatever)but that's in our hands too actually...all the best to you!
Hi Quest Girl,
Thanks for dropping by; and for the good wishes too... :)
Lets hope that things will change for the better in the days to come.
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